I really, really don't want to do this. Logically, I know why I wanted to do this. And the reasoning is still sound. (Hello, I'm tired of being over weight and hating the way I look in pictures!) I think I'm just really getting bored with doing the same thing over and over and over again. I know, three more days of this and then I get to switch things up. Still. Bored. And while I could probably throw on a different workout movie, they're all a lot longer than the Shred. An hour, as opposed to 20 minutes. And I'm tired. But if I spend anymore time bitching about this, it'll never get done. *sigh*
I feel better for having done my shred. Pride of accomplishment. Or that squeaky clean feeling after having a shower. It really doesn't matter which, right? I need to work on doing this in the mornings again though. Waiting all day is just not good. By the time evening hits I don't want to do it anymore, where as if I eat, then do the shred then shower I feel like I can tackle my day and do pretty much anything. Priorities, right? I need to get into the habit of getting up bright and early so I can do this while the kids are sleeping. Me time. And keep it up when school starts, even though I plan on hitting the pool during the week for laps when school starts up again too. I need to make a positive change in my life, because.... Because I deserve it. I deserve to be fit and healthy and to have energy. And I know when I work out in the morning I have more energy, I feel more awake. So... not so much for how I feel after today's but more goals for the future. That works, right? ;)
And a Rant!
WHY IS IT SO FUCKING WEIRD THAT AN OVERWEIGHT GIRL LIKE ME WORKS OUT?! I am seriously getting pissed off at the way people either seem to think I'm making it up, or that I can't do it, or confused because obviously the fact that I am overweight means I don't give a shit. I do. I care about my weight and the way I feel. And I'm making an honest effort to change. I may bitch about how much I don't want to do this, but I do it anyway. I know that there will come a point where I won't be able to imagine not working out every day, in the same way that I can't imagine not listening to music. But it will take time for me to get there. I know this. I accept this. But seriously, if you call yourself my friend and are spending your time waiting for me to fail? I don't need you.
...and I need to talk to my mom about this too. I'm making myself accountable by blogging about this. By making my sister do this with me. But just doing the shred isn't enough of a change. Healthy eating is next on the list. I need to find myself a good, sweet raspberry vinaigrette. Then I'll be set. Because salads will be like dessert. Yummy. ;) Less midnight snacking, but more eating during the day (I tend to skip breakfast and lunch). And healthier meals. Wish me luck.